Too Expensive

George and his wife Marge went to the State Fair every year. Every year George would say, "Marge, I'd like to ride in that airplane."

And every year Marge would say, "I know, George, but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars."

This year George and Marge went to the fair, and George said, "Marge, I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance."

Marge replied, "George, that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars."

The pilot, tired of hearing the annual argument said, "Folks, I'll make you a deal. I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you, but if you say one word it's ten dollars."

George and Marge agree and up they go. The pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word. They land and the pilot turns to George, "By golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't."

George replied, "Well, I was gonna say something when Marge fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."

Last Meal

Three prisoners are captured in the war. They are asked what they wish to have for their last meal.

The Italian asks for and receives Pepperoni Pizza.

The Frenchmen requests and receives a Filet Mignon.

The American requests a plate of strawberries. The captors are surprised and reply, "strawberries?"

"Yes, Strawberries."

"But, they are out of season!"

"That's ok. I'll wait.."

=== Thanks Milind ===

Bill Gates and the gujju...

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Kantibhai Shah.

Bill Gates: Thank you for coming. Those who do not know JAVA may leave. 2000 people leave the room. Kantibhai says to himself, 'I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll give it a try'

Bill Gates: Candidates who never had experience of managing more than 100 people may leave. 2000 people leave the room. Kantibhai says to himself ' I never managed anybody by myself but I have nothing to lose if I stay. What can happen to me?' So he stays.

Bill Gates: Candidates who do not have management diplomas may leave. 500 people leave the room. Kantibhai says to himself, 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose?' So he stays in the room.

Lastly, Bill Gates asked the candidates who do not speak Serbo - Croat to leave. 498 people leave the room. Kantibhai says to himself, ' I do not speak one word of Serbo - Croat but what do I have to lose?' So he stays and finds himself with one other candidate.

Everyone else has gone. Bill Gates joined them and said 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo - Croat, so I'd now like to hear you have a conversation together in that language.' Calmly, Kantibhai turns to the other candidate and says `kem chho' The other candidate answers 'ek dam majama..'

If Laloo became PM of India

Laloo becomes PM (if you haven't cut your throat yet, read on) and goes
to Pakistan for a one-on-one with Nawaz Sharif.They decide to meet without
aides and are closeted for about 5 minutes.

Laloo then emerges from the room. Reporters clamour for a statement.
"Nawazbhai will make the announcement" is all Laloo will say. Nawaz Sharif
comes out and drops a bombshell - Pakistan has decided to give up all claims
on Kashmir, with no strings attached!

The world is stunned. Laloo has achieved in 5 minutes what others had
failed to in 50 years! How did you do it, what did you promise, the press
clamours.

"Sab akai-waalon ka kamaal hai," (All because of the Akai company people)
says Laloo. "Woh kehte hain na, TV loge tho fridge doonga, video
khareedein to cellphone free (They give fridge free if you buy TV, cellphone
free if you buy VCR )... tho ham bhi Nawazbhai se keh diye: "aapko Kashmir
chaahiye na? Le jaayie. Magar saath mein Bihar free milega, bas!" (SO, I said
to Nawazbhai - "You want Kashmir, right? Take it. But you will get Bihar free
with it!")